ego-state-identifier

Ego State Identifier

When to Use / When Not to Use

Use when:

• A reaction felt automatic, disproportionate, or strangely familiar
• Someone describes hearing an internal critical or nurturing voice
• A relational pattern keeps repeating across different people or contexts

Not for:

• General therapy or trauma processing — refer professionally when responses involve deep distress
• Simple relationship advice without a pattern-level question

The Three Ego States (Transactional Analysis, Eric Berne)

State	What it contains	Signs
Parent (P)	Internalized voices and rules from authority figures	Moralizing, "should/must", giving unsolicited advice, feeling righteous
— Nurturing Parent	Caring, supportive	"You did your best", "Let me help you"
— Critical Parent	Rule-enforcing, judging	"You should know better", harsh self-criticism
Adult (A)	Here-and-now processor — facts, options, current reality	Asking clarifying questions, "I noticed that...", genuinely curious
Child (C)	Emotional responses and relational strategies from childhood	Feeling small, disproportionate emotion, wanting to please or rebel
— Free Child	Spontaneous, creative, playful	Joy, curiosity, creative flow states
— Adapted Child	Developed to survive original family system	People-pleasing, sulking, compliance, rebellion

Contamination: Parent or Child "bleeds into" Adult thinking (prejudice, magical thinking).

Exclusion: One state chronically dominant, others suppressed.

Process

Step 1 — Identify the event. What happened? What was the internal experience (thought, feeling, body, impulse)?

Step 2 — Map the ego state. Language is a strong indicator. Did it feel familiar — like something from childhood? Was it rational and present-focused, or patterned and past-loaded?

Step 3 — Identify the transaction (if relational). Which state was the user speaking from? Which state was the other person speaking from? Was the transaction complementary, crossed, or covert (ulterior)?

Step 4 — Identify patterns. Do certain people or situations reliably trigger this state?

Step 5 — Name the growth move. What would the Adult response look like? What would Free Child offer instead of Adapted Child?

Output Template

Ego State Analysis
------------------
Dominant state: [Parent / Adult / Child — and which variant]
Key signal: [specific language, emotion, or behavior that identified it]
Positive intent of this state: [what it was trying to do — always name this]
Cost in this situation: [what it produced that wasn't serving the person]
Relational dynamic (if applicable): [who was speaking from where, what got crossed]
Pattern: [does this repeat? in what contexts?]
Adult-state alternative: [what a grounded, present-focused response would look like]
Free Child alternative (if relevant): [what authentic, undefended response might look like]

What Claude Does / What You Do

Claude	You
Maps the reaction to a specific ego state	Share the specific situation and internal experience
Names the positive intent of even Critical Parent or Adapted Child	Sit with whether the pattern resonates
Identifies where transactions crossed or went covert	Notice which state you're in the next time it triggers
Offers the Adult and Free Child alternatives	Practice pausing before the automatic state takes over

Key insight to deliver: Every ego state had a positive original intent. The question is not "why am I broken" but "does this strategy still make sense now?"

Related Skills

• attachment-style-mirror — for relational patterns at the attachment level
• shadow-persona — for what is being suppressed or performed at a deeper level
• identity-explorer — when ego state patterns feel tied to core self-concept